Mitch Hedberg birthday comedy guys defensive driving blogOne of the shining comets of stand up comedy was Mitch Hedberg.

This lightening bolt of funny blazed across the sky and left the world much too soon.   He appeared on David Letterman and was in the film Almost Famous.

Some of his funnier lines were:

  • “My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.”
  • “Wearing a turtleneck is like being strangled by a really weak guy, all day.  Wearing a backpack and a turtleneck is like a weak midget trying to bring you down.”
  • “I don’t have a girlfriend.  But I do know a woman who’d be mad at me for saying that.”
  • “Rice is great if you’re really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.”
  • “A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer.”
  • “I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.”
  • “I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn’t have one.  So I bought a cake.”

He passed away on March 30, 2005.